BOOKS
Honorable Mentions:
Victoria Aveyard, Broken Throne
Jay Kristoff, Darkdawn
Marie Lu, Rebel
Taran Matharu, The Chosen
Randy Ribay, Patron Saints of Nothing
Decade Special Salute: Red Rising
I sell so many of these books at work, it's not even funny. This one in particular, as the first book in the series - the better to make a bunch of whole new Howlers, am I right? Hell, I even gave it to my cousin as his twentieth birthday gift this year, because that was how old I was when I first read the first book, so pretty symbolic, eh? As I tell all my customers to whom I sell it, Red Rising is second only to Harry Potter on my list of favorite series ever, and earns its place on the basis of Pierce Brown's unparalleled homaging and world-building skills.
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| Per aspera ad astra...but get ready to see more of Pierce Brown on this list. |
5. Bobby Hall, Supermarket
Another book I've gifted to someone I care about very much this year - to Koda, in fact, for his birthday. As a Logic fan, I knew he'd love it. As a fellow creative and writer, I knew he'd relate to Hall's meta-fictional depiction of the mental toll that creativity can take. And as a boy from the wilds of inland Oregon, I knew Koda would ultra-relate to Flynn on that level for sure. Though the book was somewhat hamstrung by bad reviews, I can tell you that it was hella easy to hand-sell to numerous customers from all over the world, based on how bloody bonkers and bloody awesome it was. And is.
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| Tarantino? Chairman Mao? Nah, just a millennial genius. |
4. Elizabeth Acevedo, With the Fire on High
Acevedo's debut, The Poet X, naturally was in verse as befits its title. Here, she's gone to writing in prose, and that's not the only diametric opposition of style between her stellar sophomore effort and her debut. Focusing on a girl with cooking as her gift, and who's had a child but isn't judged for it by her Catholic ancestors - hell, the fact that Emoni's abuela is so magnificently supportive was a real breath of fresh air as opposed to X's oppressive, disgusting mother - With the Fire on High proves that Acevedo is one of the greatest artists in literature today, never sticking to one style but trying many with great, great results.
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| Mmm...blood oranges. |
3. Pierce Brown, Dark Age
I told you Pierce Brown was gonna crop up again on this list, and with his fifth novel, he's really outdone himself in terms of scope. Not for nothing did he describe this one as a "Frankenstein" and a "mental twister" - five POVs, exploring more new worlds in his futuristic solar system, and 700-plus pages to shock and awe us all. Who the hell knows where we'll go in Book 6? All I hope, though, is that it doesn't end the Red Rising Saga, because I'd hate to see it go knowing how amazingly talented Brown is, an inspiration to me on so many artistic levels.
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| *hiss* but he'ssssss ssssssstill an apexxxxxxx assssssssshole... *hiss* |
2. Angie Thomas, On the Come Up
Just like Elizabeth Acevedo before her on this list, so Angie Thomas earns herself a place in the Pinecones with a second novel even better than her first. As amazing and timely and necessary as The Hate U Give was, On the Come Up is an even more complex and fascinating read, playing up Bri's lyrical genius and tying it in to Thomas's omnipresent themes of much-needed social justice. Though Fox 2000 might not be the studio that makes this movie, here's hoping that one other arm of Disney helps the movie get off the ground the way Lucasfilm got Children of Blood and Bone.
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| Another 400-page mic drop, but the mic stays held up. |
1. Tomi Adeyemi, Children of Virtue and Vengeance
It took almost the entire year for Tomi Adeyemi to give us the sequel to Children of Blood and Bone - thanks in part to delays coming up at least twice - but while the sequel to one of last year's Pinecone winners was a shorter book, it was far, far punchier. And full of unexpected twists even as it built on a very Young Elites-esque series of storytelling directions. Children of Virtue and Vengeance is a rainbow of magic and power and one of the most epic novels I've seen in years, and that ending has to be seen to be believed in how horrifying it is. Truly the most diabolical cliffhanger in history, and now to wait another year or more for the third book? Adeyemi, you got me way too hooked.
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| Also, the level of photorealism on this cover is truly something to behold. |
MOVIES
Honorable Mentions:
Alita: Battle Angel
Captain Marvel
Pokémon: Detective Pikachu
Toy Story 4
Ready Or Not
Decade Special Salute: The Amazing Spider-Man Series
Do I really have to say it? I mean, the number of times I bring these movies up, it's truly a disease. But what's not a disease is how much for all the flaws in these diamonds, Peter and Gwen - and Andrew Garfield and Emma Stone - are not among them. They're simply too amazing to be ignored, and I'm still in search of that alternate world where they got to play in the MCU like nature intended on the strength of their powerhouse performances in these high-stakes, high-action, high-emotion blockbuster thrill rides.
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| I also really need these movies on Blu-ray. For real. |
5. Spider-Man: Far From Home
But you know what? As amazing as Garfield is, was, and always will be, the MCU is still damn good for having Tom Holland lend his uniquely charming adolescent take on Spidey, and Far From Home keeps the pattern going of all the live-action on-screen Spideys giving their best work in their second movies. (Yes, that includes Garfield, fight me on this.) This one, in addition to helping settle the wreckage of Infinity War and Endgame, is truly an unforgettable thirty-twist pileup of a plot, never letting up for even a second - and that includes the post-credits. There's still no way of knowing where the MCU goes next from here, not when the next few movies are going to take things in entirely new directions too - into the past, into the future, and to other worlds as well. But thank all the gods Tom Holland managed to negotiate a continuation for Spidey after Sony threatened to pull the plug AGAIN. (Still haven't forgiven them for any of their previous shenanigans, and this is no exception.)
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| "Bitch please, you've been to space!" |
4. Glass
Does it really surprise you that I'm putting this one above Far From Home? Well, I think it deserves it, because I'm still pissed that this year, the critics remembered they were supposed to have an irrational hate-on for Shyamalan and pretended that Glass, the conclusion to the loose trilogy begun in Unbreakable and Split, was a garbage movie predicated on too many of the usual Shyamalan twists. Yes, it was a twisty one, but even with that knowledge in mind as a Shyamalan fan, I still found this movie a particularly powerful roller-coaster ride, unpredictable and surprising the whole damn way, "et cetera!"
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| Not pictured: Sarah Paulson in the pink. |
3. Us
Get Out was great, but Jordan Peele's following the same kind of pattern mentioned above with Elizabeth Acevedo, Angie Thomas, and Tomi Adeyemi - his second film is even better than its predecessor, not least of which because it's truly one of the scariest films of all time. Taking sitcom and horror tropes aplenty and turning them on their heads in an apocalyptic vision of class warfare and the possibilities of worlds that could be, and are, sideways to ours, Us is a film for the ages, and if Lupita Nyong'o doesn't get the Oscar for this one like Jordan Peele no doubt will (again), that'll be a sign that some people might be trying to start a Tethered uprising...
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| "Once...there was...a girl..." |
2. Avengers: Endgame
Three hours of action and emotion to end the Infinity Saga, but not the MCU. Not yet. Need I say more?
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| Everyone unite to destroy the raisin man. For real and forever. |
1. Knives Out
Oooooooh...this movie. This fine, fine movie. I'd been expecting The Rise of Skywalker to take the Pinecone first prize this year just like the first two sequel movies did, but sorry J.J. Abrams...it's Rian Johnson who's taking first place again, in a brilliant and subversive little murder mystery with an all-star cast that deserves all the attention and all the prizes at all the award ceremonies. If Jordan Peele isn't cleaning up with Us, that is. But Knives Out continues on Johnson's themes of never running out of cards up the sleeve, criticism of white and male privilege both - hell, even the ad campaign, while putting Daniel Craig and Chris Evans and Jamie Lee Curtis front and center, tricked us into not realizing that Ana de Armas was the true star of the show. The 2010s ended on a high note as far as cinema goes, and we all know it's Rian Johnson's fault.
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| Johnson wants to make a Benoit Blanc series? Bring it on. Especially if Kelly Marie Tran gets to be the leading lady in the sequel like she deserves. |
TV
Honorable Mentions:
Watchmen
Arrow
The 100
Stumptown
Lucifer
Decade Special Salute: Agents of SHIELD
My favorite show for the last several years, and for sure it'll get some level of recognition next year in the 2020 Pinecones for its final season. But for its first six years, Agents of SHIELD has been the best part of the Marvel Cinematic Universe and increasingly, y'all have slept on it. Except for those of us still devoted to follow it in all its glorious storytelling pods, each one such a massive shift away from the one before it that the show just never, ever stops delivering on all Joss Whedon's promise.
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| Also: that this show was my introduction to Chloe Bennet cements its place as a lifetime fave. |
5. A Series of Unfortunate Events
Netflix dropped the final season of A Series of Unfortunate Events on New Year's Day this year, and naturally, I spent that day bingeing all seven episodes that covered the last four books. It was so glorious to see them finally adapted to film as they've deserved for a decade and a half, give or take. Even with a few small issues - the bad-CGI mold that they made the Medusoid Mycelium instead of the menacing mushrooms of the books; The End only getting a single episode and having to leave out soooooooo much detail from the book - it all built up to a terrific ending that stunned me on so many levels, and made me feel like my years of fandom in this series finally got the closure that's so eluded us.
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| Nice to see the series adapting to today's gender neutrality norms too. |
4. Evil
I wasn't a big fan of The Good Wife, but BrainDead (insert "You Might Think" on endless repeat here) was a better taste for me of the unique dramedy stylings of Robert and Michelle King. Now, they've set their sights on a quirky little supernatural thriller, the sort of story that makes a better update to The Exorcist than the actual reboot TV series that was on Fox a couple years back. With a welcome emphasis on family love - and also family strife, as well as some truly messed up blending of black and potty humor for texture - it's one of the most unique series to grace our screens this year, and I'm very glad that it was the first new fall show this broadcast season to get a Season 2 renewal as well.
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| Also of note - the endless knocks on social media and technology. |
3. Stranger Things 3
Of course this one gets third place in the rankings, being the third season of Netflix's best and brightest show by far. And more than ever, this one was an ambitious nine-hour film come to life, the ultimate expression of 80s action and thrills and cheese and horror. Nearly a two-year hiatus after the second season? Hopefully they won't take so long for ST4...
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| Presenting the most horrifying lost conflict of the Cold War: THE BATTLE OF STARCOURT. |
2. The Mandalorian
I still kinda wish that the first-ever live-action Star Wars TV series had actually been on TV, whether on Disney Channel or Freeform or ABC or what, instead of justifying me having to shell out for yet another streaming service. But hey, The Mandalorian proved to be the best possible exploration of a new side of the galaxy: the lawless side, struggling to get by when the Empire is in its last death throes, but there's still a ton of surprises in store. I will spoil none of them, but by this point we all know the biggest and best spoiler of all: BABY FREAKING YODA. He alone will get you to buy Disney+ and be worth the subscription cost. Guaranteed.
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| Also: Taika Waititi as IG-88. 'Nuff said. |
1. The Expanse
Two years after Syfy last aired it, The Expanse has finally arrived with a new Season 4 streaming on Amazon, based on one of the most shake 'em up books in the entire series, Cibola Burn. The production value remains as high as ever, as does the diversity, and so does, thank God, Avasarala being the most foul-mouthed and awesome presidential-type figure ever written. I'm still working to catch up on this new season, and very, very glad that Amazon already announced a Season 5 on top of that.
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| And Burn Gorman's in it too. Please don't forget that. |
MUSIC
Honorable Mentions:
The Black Keys, "Lo/Hi"
The Jonas Brothers, "Only Human"
Jvanz, "Delusional"
Pink, "Walk Me Home"
Weezer, "Can't Knock the Hustle"
Decade Special Salute: Taylor Swift, "Look What You Made Me Do"
Taylor Swift makes catchy song after catchy song that, for the longest time, would do nothing but annoy me. Then along comes a tune that sounds Danny Elfman enough to appeal to my Tim Burton fanboy side, and sassy enough to make this bi boy sound hella gay when he sings it - and you're right to assume I've memorized every single goddamn lyric. She did the impossible and made me love her song, and for that, she earns the strangest Decade Special Salute of them all.
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| But God, this part of the official video makes me die ROFLing every time. |
5. Billie Eilish, "bury a friend"
2019 has truly been the year of Billie Eilish, gamely filling in the gap left behind in the airwaves by Lorde's hiatus. And while she's had a ton of good songs out this year - "bad guy," "everything i wanted," "all the good girls go to hell" - none beat "bury a friend" for sheer earworm value and emo sweet creepiness. That it was the official song of a lot of ad campaigns for Evil on CBS only helps.
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| Koda did tell me once his gf looks like Billie Eilish. Now I know what she'd look like with black contacts. |
4. Tones & I, "Dance Monkey"
By rights, this isn't a song I should like - as catchy and lyrically on point as it is, you're still never going to unhear how much Tones & I sings like Sia doing an Elmo impression. But maybe that's why the song is so big on alternative radio, far more than contemporary or even Top 40 - it's such a left-field kind of hit, and it makes me hope I get to see Tones & I live one day. And that she gets to achieve even greater success in the 2020s.
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| "They say, oh my God, I see the way you shine Take your hands, my dear, and place them both in mine..." |
3. Coldplay, "Arabesque"
It's "Orphans" that's getting all the attention from Everyday Life, the first new Coldplay album in four years...but really, the song that should've gotten all the attention is the one that sounds nothing like anything else they've ever done. Helped by Stromae providing vocals in French and Femi Kuti leading a horn section that reminds me very strongly of Pink Floyd's "Us and Them," this is the most prog-rockin' song Coldplay ever did - and that's coming from a guy who's appreciated their prog touches and concepts on all their albums since Viva La Vida.
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| "SAME FUCKING BLOOD!!" |
2. Dakoda, "Ice"
Ain't it strange that this year, my Lord and my Wulf God Dakoda Bigelow doesn't land first place or a Special Salute? (Well, to be fair, Grace Bigelow is largely responsible for this year's #1 winner, so there's always a Bigelow win as far as I'm concerned.) But for my fave from my best bro this year, as much as I love the end-of-year surprise he dished out in his sugary sweet "Runaway," I have to go with the first track of his three-song EP "Aries." I gotta go with "Ice." As much as I loved "Snow" back in 2017 and gave it a Special Salute that year, this song is its logical spiritual successor, another ethereal soundscape of chills (and watch as I briefly click over to Spotify and see a Bleu by Chanel ad that makes me think soooooo much of what a music video of "Ice" could involve...")
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| Seriously Kodes, you'd pull this shit off like Magic Mike. Lol. |
But for real, "Ice" is a dangerous little song, not as audibly angry as the rest of the songs on the "Aries" EP, but still proof that even if you can't fully 100% relate to the lyrical content, Koda will still strike you right in the feels. And of all his songs, this one is, to me, one of his most relatable by far - because even though I'm such a lil' Glaceon ice boy at heart, I still want someone to light my heart on fire before, like Anna almost endured in the first Frozen, it freezes so solid as to be unmeltable.
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| "Cold blooded running on that liquid nitrogen You don't know this Antarctica that I've been living in..." |
1. Yungblud feat. Dan Reynolds, "original me"
Heheheheh, and Grace Bigelow helps me find the real winner of this year's best song, a song by the singular hip-hop-rockin' brash Brit, Yungblud. And Dan Reynolds too, cutting loose in a way that no Imagine Dragons song since "Believer" really has, except maybe "Natural." So he's staying in the Pinecones too, and Yungblud, whom I never paid much attention to until Grace brought him to my attention, makes his Pinecone debut as smashingly as possible. And as hilarious - and darkly witty - as his "Parents" was (the part where he brags about fucking his best friend made me die laughing because if it were me, I'd be fulfilling Grace's ship, lololol), it's the rage against a world determined to pigeonhole you that makes me love "original me" most of all.
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| "Some days I wish I was anyone else I'm the original loser..." |
And that's it. The last Pinecones of the decade. Hope you found some new great stuff to enjoy before the new one begins!
Till next time, Pinecones...
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| #FeedTheRightWolf |
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| Remember: Denis Leary is always watching. Always. |
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